Thoughts

com·mit·ment
   /kəˈmɪtmənt/ Show Spelled[kuh-mit-muhnt] Show IPA
–noun
1. the act of committing.
2. the state of being committed.
3. the act of committing, pledging, or engaging oneself.
4. a pledge or promise; obligation: We have made a commitment to pay our bills on time.
5. engagement; involvement: They have a sincere commitment to religion.
6. perpetration or commission, as of a crime.
7. consignment, as to prison.
8. confinement to a mental institution or hospital: The psychiatrist recommended commitment.
9. an order, as by a court or judge, confining a person to a mental institution or hospital.
10. Law. a written order of a court directing that someone be confined in prison; mittimus.
11. Parliamentary Procedure. the act of referring or entrusting to a committee for consideration.
12. Stock Exchange.
a. an agreement to buy or sell securities.
b. a sale or purchase of securities.

What does it mean to be committed to something? When do we cross a line where we owe someone or something a piece of ourselves? I do not understand this concept, probably never have, and doubt that I ever will. Why do so many people fear commitment? Fear being vulnerable and open and tying themselves to one another or to an idea, an ideal? Sorry, these are just random ramblings.

Ketchup, Catsup, or....Catchup

I realized recently that I have not written in this hardly at all lately - shame. So here we go, random ramblings of what's been going on lately. A few nights ago I was doing what is, in my mind at least, a typical college student task - late night laundry. I hauled all my stuff down to the laundry room - I live in 'privileged housing' which means, among other things, that we have 2 washers and dryers on each floor of our dorms. Kind of nice. Anyway, so I'm doing my laundry late at night, scrounging for quarters, etc, going through the motions of what has become such a norm for me over the past four years and suddenly it hits me - this is probably the last time that this will ever happen. Whoa. It was weird. I literally stopped and stood still thinking about that for a minute. I mean I keep saying that I don't think the whole graduation thing has really hit me yet and in some ways I still don't think that it has, but since that moment doing laundry I've been having lots of 'this is probably the last time I'll ever....' moments. Well, there's more to this than this, but it'll have to stop here because it's now 3:30 am - distracted by much more important things - and I'm sleepy.